Welcome to the Blending Healthy Families Blog!
This week we’re touching on the realities of being 30 (and a stepparent!)
I used to say that I didn’t want marriage and kids before 30. I was very firm on that, to the point I remember sitting in Arnie’s with my mom and my aunt crying because they were grilling me so hard on my decision to marry a man with kids. (All out of love, of course!)
More backstory, I had always said I wanted to go to Peru before I was 30 and hike the Inca Trail. I’m not sure why, but that has always been my thing. It was something I told my husband while we were dating and something he supported. It was somewhere we even had planned to go before 2020.
Well 2020 didn’t pan out well for travel and that really upset me! I did a lot of work with my therapist, had some tough conversations with my husband and went inside myself to really reflect on where my life was going.
Here’s what I found:
- I was still constantly dreaming about a life I couldn’t have anymore (single and free spirit with minimal financial obligations) and I was holding that against my husband.
- I needed to embrace the family that I married into as hard as I was embracing the memories of being single.
- I was focusing more on what I was missing out on rather than embracing the experiences that I get to teach and share these little ones.
- I needed to view each moment with the kids as a way to help them grow and prosper so they have dreams just like I do, instead of resenting the idea of a life they weren’t part of.
- I was blaming everyone for my choice to marry a man with kids.
- I needed to accept and own that I made the choice to get married and have a blended family.
So I worked with my therapist to find tools that worked for me and my anxiety, to welcome the chaos! It wasn't (and isn't easy) and not every day has these happy feelings. But when I let go of the past, I was able to fully live out my future.
What's one thing you need to let go of??
RECIPE TIME:
This week, we’re featuring a meal I have loved before, during and after becoming a stepmom. It’s a food that grounds and comforts ME and can be made a variety of ways: FAJITAS!
Fajitas Four Ways
Serving Size: 4 Time: 30 minutes
Ingredients
1 lb chicken, shrimp, steak, mushrooms, cut into strips
3 bell peppers (any color works)
1 large onion
2 T coconut oil
8-10 corn tortillas
Guacamole, optional
Seasoning, makes 6 Tablespoons
1 T ground cumin
1 T chili powder
1 T paprika
1 T sea salt
1 T dried oregano
1 t garlic powder
1 t onion powder
1 t cayenne pepper
Directions
Add oil to a non-stick skillet.
Add protein slices to the pan and sprinkle 2 TB fajitas seasoning on top and mix around.
Once protein is cooked halfway through (about 4 mins) add the peppers and onions and the rest of the fajitas seasoning. Add lid. Cook veggies to desired texture and protein is cooked all the way through.
If your skillet dries out, add 1/4 cup of water and steam with lid on until it's evaporated.
While skillet is cooking, prep your tortillas.
If you have a gas/flame, turn on low and roast your tortilla over the open flame. Keep an eye on it to ensure it doesn’t burn
If you don’t, microwave the stack of tortillas for 30 seconds and place in between a clean kitchen towel
Serve on corn tortillas with guacamole.
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